Sunday, December 14, 2008

Body and Soul – Audition Script #2

BODY AND SOUL - THE PLAY The play begins with two gay men. Then, as the conversation between them reaches a critical point, the two take a break -- and when they return to the stage to continue the conversation, one of the male characters has been replaced by an identically dressed woman and the conversation continues, though as a heterosexual dialogue. Again, the dialogue reaches a breaking point and the two take a break (for cell phones) – and when they return to the stage to continue the conversation, the remaining male has been replaced with an identically dressed woman and the conversation is resolved by the two lesbian women. The play is largely comic, though with strong and direct confrontations between the characters.

A CUTTING FROM SCENE #2
SETTING – BILL, a jerk, has been hitting on HARRIET. For the first time in an extended conversation, she admits she does have some feelings for him.

HARRIET Bill, I don't know why, but I'm. . .I'm also developing feelings for you. (catching herself) Despite everything.

BILL (seductively)
So you are open...to a "spiritual" relationship with me? I'm touched. I'm really touched and I want to be completely open to you. . . and I mean open in every way.

HARRIET
I'm not sure I get this.

BILL
I want to be completely open to you. . . in every way.

HARRIET
Hold on. Let me get this straight. We've just met and you...you want me . . .to allow you . . . to be inside me? You expect me to be involved with you on the most intimate of levels?

BILL
Is that so bad?

HARRIET
Is that so bad? You want to touch my most private parts, to violate my deepest intimacies – and you ask, "Is that so bad?" You don't even know my name!

BILL
Who cares? We're both adults – and we're not getting married are we?

HARRIET
You have no idea about who I am, do you?

BILL
OK. So what do you do?

HARRIET
I'm a city employee.

BILL
Hey! So am I!

HARRIET
I'm on the police force.

BILL
Really? So you're taking a break from handing out all those tickets?

HARRIET
Not really. I'm a vice cop.

BILL
You're kidding.

HARRIET
Yes, I'm kidding.

BILL
Thank God. So what do you do?

HARRIET
I'm a priest – an Episcopal priest.

BILL
Oh, God. I'm sorry.

HARRIET
Sorry? You're sorry for what? Two minutes ago I was some kind of a piece of meat and now I'm some kind of holy person?

BILL
Well . . aren't you?

HARRIET
Honey, we all are. We women are all holy. You screw with me and you're screwing with God.

BILL (after a time of bewilderment)
That's very scary.

HARRIET What's scary?

BILL
I'm scary . . (catching himself). . I mean, I'm scared.

THE PLAY CONTINUES. . . .

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